“There is a much deeper relationship that you gain here you really talk to these girls, you find out what their journey and path has been. You’re like ‘wow’ I can really relate to this.”
The truth is, I’m still me, I’m still the same person I was before this diagnosis.
My recovery story begins when I asked for help getting out of an abusive relationship. I was dating a guy who gave no regard to me or my body. He made me have sex with him and do sexual things every time we were together. I was afraid of him. I never directly said no […]
My name is Milagro and I have been fighting with mental illness since I was seven years old. I am now twenty seven. My mother had depression and an anxiety disorder. My bothers and I have been in and out of the foster care system since I was three. My father passed away when I […]
I was born in January 1964 an Aquarian…. I did really well at High School and left with 5 Highers (3A and 2B) I chose not to go to university and started working in Central Regional Council as a trainee accountant. This was not what I really wanted to do… actually would have liked to […]
After leaving the Armed Forces, I was diagnosed with clinical Depression, chronic Anxiety and PTSD. I found myself on a waiting list for Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), and was offered mind-altering medication to help me until my name came up. This was not acceptable to me, but I had little choice; there were few other […]
What the agoraphobic wants *normal* people to know: When I say I can’t go out I really can’t. For some reason my brain reacts as if it’s life threatening event. And what I experience is very similar to what everyone does when they start to pass away, scary huh? Imagine having those feelings through out […]
“But then the miracle happened. I grew tired of reliving the same day over and over again. I knew I wanted to change but didn’t know how. I reached out to the VA mental health system. I began a series of out-patient programs. I was diagnosed with PTSD, Chronic Depressive Disorder and BPD which are all common for abuse victims. This journey of recovery has not been easy. I had to learn to be honest with myself, accept my emotions for what they are, face the darkness of the past and learn the future is more important than the past.”
“People tend to think of suicide as not seeing or appreciating the good in their life, but that’s not it. Usually there’s a little bit of good, a lot of bad, and no break from any of it, so suicide is about wanting to be free; free from the relentlessness of life. If you don’t like your job, you take a holiday; if you’re tired from housework you take a break; but when it’s your body and brain causing the difficulty, there is no escape.”
“But now I know that I’m not a mistake. I wasn’t created ugly. None of us are.
Sometimes I look in the mirror and see ugly. Sometimes I get caught up in looks and weight. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t still find some sort of self-worth in how much I weigh. But that’s why I choose recovery. That’s why I choose to fight and try to help others through my story. I am nowhere near perfect, but I hope I can encourage and inspire others.”