I would have never thought that at nearly 40, educated, and the picture of success, I would be jobless and laying on a gurney in the hall of the city ER surrounded by people with life threatening injuries and illnesses, the flu, and everything else under the sun. Yet, suddenly this was my reality. Within days I was seeking treatment, having multiple follow-up appointments, completing a self-care plan, and trying to rebuild my life.
Now here I am, the founder and creator of Where Is The Sunshine? a multi-social media network of support and love, helping those who feel alone, need some reassurance or who have simply felt the need to not continue. Where is the Sunshine? was almost founded by accident when I started sharing inspirational quotes and artwork on Facebook after getting tired of seeing the non-stop negativity. Not from my personal network of friends, but from social media in general. Soon after my “breakdown,” I realized that all I needed to possibly change people lives and heal myself were a few free apps and the belief that I could somehow positively influence the world. Lofty goal, no?
Within hours I began to reach out to my local network of mental health organizations and offered my services whether it be volunteering, fundraising or guest speaking. To say I made lemonade out of lemons is understatement. Like many who have OCD, Bipolar 2, Anxiety and everywhere else in between, work and perfectionism were my life. I survived on no sleep and in a constant state of hypomania – working, creating, promoting, sharing, and building on each subsequent success. Then it suddenly came crashing down as dramatic as the fall of Rome. However, I was blessed with my own personal renaissance. Art, music, creativity, love and hope were suddenly renewed and something I wanted to share with the world. Where is the Sunshine? is just one part of this renaissance. I feel rejuvenated.
My family is happier. I’m happier. Yes, this is a recovery process but I no longer see the light at the end of the tunnel as an oncoming train. For me, that light is sunshine. I don’t have to ask where is the sunshine anymore. I’m seeing it peek through the clouds and just that alone is reason to continue.