When I first started my blog almost two years ago… I never really had a reason to why I was writing. I just wrote what I felt. I haven’t been writing for a few different reasons… 1) I feel stuck and unmotivated. ( I feel like whatever I write will just be redundant and very depressing) 2) Soon, I’ll be going through some big changes in my life. (Granted, I have no clue what they are to the fullest, but I’m scared beyond belief)
I used to be this dreamer of unrealistic things. I had that dream to move to the big city and live an amazing life in that high rise and have that gorgeous closet that every girl dreams of. I don’t quite think that way anymore. NO, I am not a realist. But my thoughts on everything have changed. I like to please people and make them happy. When in fact I need to make myself happy, because in the end it is my life and my story and I’m the writer.
To all my fellow readers, no matter where you are in this world emotionally and physically… just remember there is someone out there that feels close, if not the same as you. Right now, if I could envision the perfect life… I see… that awesome job that I get to look my best at every day and I can talk and meet new people. I see that good group of friends I can be myself around and they accept me for who I am. I see my boyfriend wanting to get a place with me and start our lives together. I see my son finally getting that male role model figure in his life that he needs.
But in all seriousness my life can be that… it’s not a far away dream.
Change is what we fear most. We are sometimes so afraid to change and we just stay the same and that’s when we become more and more depressed.
And right now I’m going through that period in my life where I am about to go through a big change. It happens every few years, and I know I’m scared but I know it’s something that just has to happen.
Do me a favor, when you know this stage in your life is going to happen… Don’t forget to love yourself in the process.
Never forget to love yourself first.